It is almost the end of the first month of a new year. Research shows many of us have set aside our resolutions and returned to our December lives. However, when we let go of our New Year’s resolutions, it doesn’t mean we let go of our desire to be better people. This is where counseling can come in.

While many people are very comfortable with the idea of counseling, many others are not. They feel if they go to counseling, they may be seen as “crazy” or weak. I strongly believe it is quite the opposite. If someone is “crazy,” they wouldn’t recognize they needed help; asking for help is one of the hardest things we can do. It is not an act of weakness; it is an act of strength.

So you’ve decided you want to go to a counselor for help. What can you expect on the first visit? It can vary greatly depending on which counselor you see. Today I will tell you what you can expect at your first visit with me.

You will be asked to fill out a short form to collect your general information: name, address, date of birth, emergency contact, etc. You will also be given a paper titled “Counselor-Client Agreement” to read through. In this paper, I tell you a bit about the counseling process, my fees, and rules about confidentiality. If you agree to the terms, you sign the sheet. That’s all for paperwork!

Next we sit down together and we begin talking. You may want to start talking and tell me what’s going on in your life. I may have specific questions to ask. The main goal in this first session is getting to know one another. It is very important to feel a connection to your counselor, and I tell clients that if after three meetings they don’t feel I am a good fit for them, I will help them find someone else to see. All counselors have different personalities, so you may have to look around a bit.

As you begin sharing your story with me, I will ask questions for clarification and start to build a picture of your life in my head. I will listen for themes that may pop up several times; I will listen for the way you see your self, others and the world.  It often flows like a regular conversation. I have a laid-back personality that allows people to feel safe sharing. I love hearing my clients tell their stories.

At the end of the session I collect payment and we set up another appointment if you wish to come back. The session lasts about 50 minutes.

It is very simple, and I work hard to make my office a calming space for everyone who walks through the doors. (I even have toys you can play with while you talk to me if that helps you feel more comfortable!)

If you’re thinking about counseling but have been hesitant, I encourage you to call or email me, and we can set up an appointment.

 

 

As a counselor, I believe almost anyone can benefit from counseling. There is a stigma that people who go to therapy are “crazy.” The reality is, I don’t have any clients who are “crazy.” I see clients who are struggling in their lives. Sometimes it is over a particular issue (e.g. divorce, anxiety, work stress, family stress, grief), and sometimes it is an overall dissatisfaction with their lives. They know they don’t feel “right,” and they are looking for guidance on how to feel and function better in their lives.

Sometimes there may be a mental health diagnosis that needs to be made, but often times, clients just need a little assistance to help them feel whole again.

I do this by listening to clients tell me about their lives. (Some people don’t have anyone in their lives who will just listen to them for an extended period of time.) I then share with them what I hear them saying and bring up the themes and patterns I notice in their stories. Together we come up with ways to make the changes the client wants in their lives. With adults, this process is often done through talk therapy alone. With kids, I use play therapy to enter their worlds and create change. However, some adults benefit from (and enjoy) play therapy. The sessions are based on each individual client and how they want to experience counseling.

Sometimes this can take one session if the problem is acute. Other times, it can take many sessions if the problem is more complex.

If you have considered counseling for yourself, or your child, I would encourage you to try it. I tell clients it is important to find the right fit for you and your family. Not every counselor is a good fit for every person. I recommend meeting with someone three times before deciding if the counselor you have found is a good fit. If they are not, don’t be discouraged. There are many different counselors with many different styles. What is important is you find the right fit to help you make the changes you want in your life.